Things NOT To Say To A Military Spouse

As a military wife who’s husband is deployed, I’ve heard it ALL!

I have received an OVERWHELMING amount of love and support from my family, friends and even strangers, knowing the hardships that come with a loved one being over seas. However, I have also heard all the questions, and comments that make you think “What in the world!?!”


Things NOT to say to a military spouse, especially when on deployment.

“Are you scared he’s going to die?”

Um, WHATTTT!!! How is this even a question….!! I will never forget the day when a person asked me this. I. WAS. FLOORED. My first thought was to actually throat punch them, however, I have come to realize that jail time is not worth some peoples stupidity. This is NOT, and I repeat, NOT a question you ask to a military spouse, or anyones spouse, like EVERRR!!!

“Its only 9 months, you’ll be fine”

They’re completely right, it is only 9 months, and I will be fine and for that I am grateful. However, it is 9 months. A lot can happen in 9 months… No birthdays, no anniversarys, no New Years Kiss. I mean come on, a baby is conceived and born in 9 months… you catch my drift.

“I don’t know how you do it”

Guess what, me neither and some days are better than others. But YOU won’t. Thats right, I am willing to stand by my husband’s side while he is serving our country or not. But I hope that you will never know what its like to “do it” as it’s a task that only the strongest spouses can handle!!

“Are you scared he’s going to cheat?”

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!! Now this woman had some nerve… I’m pretty sure if looks could… well, you know how the saying goes… Please realize that both military spouses have a lot on their plate, and yes, I’m sure that we’ve all heard stories about someone being unfaithful one time or another. But the answer in NO. Honestly these men (and women) are more worried about bigger things (refer to question number 1)

“You chose this life”

Whoa, what? *Insert music stopping* The only thing I chose to do was to love and support my husband, even if that means he will be deployed overseas to do a job most won’t. People choose what type of coffee they’re going to get, what color car they’re going to buy next, what they want to be when they grow up. And well me, I chose to love my husband.


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